40k theme-park (daft fantasy only, not a rumour)

[BrotherAlpharius]

I’ve just come back from two weeks in Orlando, Florida and it was fantastic. “Well lucky you,” I hear you say (or think), “but this is a 40k forum, not a holiday feedback site”. Bear with me, it will become clear. Now unlike the rest of my holiday companions I’m not a hardcore whiteknuckle ride junkie and frankly I was pretty apprehensive about going on some of the rides, but not wanting to let the side down I was determined to go through with it. First up, The Tower of Terror – as my friends eagerly told me how it drops you 13 storeys I started to find the idea of sitting on a bench in the sun looking after everyone’s bags quite appealing. But then I realized that, short of sky-diving or bungee jumping, this was the closest I was going to get to Deepstriking (thanks for bearing with me). Others around me looked nervous but I grinned as we boarded our drop-pod, sorry, lift. As it turns out the Tower of Terror is only vaguely how I imagined a drop-pod ride and then only if the drop-pod was landing on a daemon world made of rubber! However the genie was out of the bottle and I started thinking what you could do if you took the money and expertise behind the Orlando theme parks and combined it with the intellectual property of Games Workshop.

So far, for rides I have:
Gargant Terror – like Tower of Terror but you are all strapped in the back of a chimera which is picked up, shaken and then dropped by a gargant.

Deepstrike! – a drop-pod simulator based on the Mission Space centrifuge technology subjecting you to serious g-forces as you are fired from a battlebarge and down to the surface of a hostile plant.

Da Mek’s Wurkshop – like the General Motors Test Track but with Ork buggies – hold on tight as you hurtle through a track littered with hazards.

Devoured – (water raft ride) as toxic fluids spill across the landscape you just have time to leap aboard a raft of floating debris before being sucked up the feeder tendrils into the mouth of a tyranid bio titan, you then race down its gullet into darkness and are carried around through bio corridors lit by eerie fluorescent spores haunted by scuttling nid critters before finally a battle cannon shell impact blows a hole in the beast’s belly and you are hurled back out into the light to escape!

I thought of loads more but rather than bore you with an exhaustive list, I give you the tip of the iceberg, now what other rides can people think of? I’m sure there must be something for every race.

[fuzzbuket]

I'm lovin this idea

[BrotherAlpharius]

Thanks. I was worried it was a bit too frivolous since the chances of GW doing it are nil and it would probably be too niche market to be viable, but we can dream.

Here's another idea to try to nudge the ball rolling again - Space Hulk. Inspired by the Men In Black ride at Universal Studios - you get kitted out with "lasguns" and "flak-vests"then in groups you venture into a Space Hulk maze where you have to blast gaunts and genestealers that drop from the ceiling, burst through the floor and lunge from the walls. Water jets, flame jets and sparks from severed pipes and cables add to the sense of being trapped. At the end you find out whether you survived and if so whether you're a lowly conscript or a hardened vet.

[Heroka Vendile]

a rollercoaster could have land speeder,shaped cars

a copy of pirates of the caribean ride (a slow water ride with ~20 seater boats, but with a couple drops), but travelling through sewers under an Empire city where skaven, mutants and cultists lurk around/fight each other (anamatronics)

[Drew da Destroya]

The Imperial Guardsmen's Uplifting Training Simulator - Lasertag, with Lasgun-styled guns, and Flak Vest chest/back sensors.

Of course, aside from full-on rides, you need other things in a theme park... such as "Da Fungus Beerhall", an Ork/Orc themed eating/drinking area, "The Immortal Emperor's New Clothing Shop", "Wyche's Armoury" (a weapon shop).

Maybe something like the "Astartes Tactical Control", a big area full of gaming tables for Fantasy/40k/WOTR?

[robertsjf]

The Imperial Guardsmen's Uplifting Training Simulator - Lasertag, with Lasgun-styled guns, and Flak Vest chest/back sensors.

So we'd be using actual lasguns?

How about Freebootaz of the Karibeeyan?

[Psychosplodge]

I’ve just come back from two weeks in Orlando, Florida and it was fantastic. “Well lucky you,” I hear you say (or think), “

**** he's in my mind!! the voices are real! Nooooooooooooo!!

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But seriously it could be good but is the target market big enough?

[Sangre]

This is the grim darkness of the future! All the rides could be lethal!

[Commissar Lewis]

Damn, that would be an awesome theme park.

[imperialsavant]

I think we must have a "Warp Translation" ride. You know crazy colours swirling outside the vehicle with hideous faces appearing plus shreeks, groans, weird music plus of course the vehicle must buck & twist etc. Free sickie bags provided!

Oh & how about an Inquisition Interrogation Chamber complete with flaming lanterns, twisted servitors etc.

Can we start to sell Shares in this company????