A Crash Course in Feminism Mk. II (or, why everyone should be a feminist)

[Anthrax ion pusscabe]

look if you haven't guessed by now I hate the entirety of the human species and it's supposed civilisation, all humans have ever done to me 90% of the time is single me out as some kind of freak who doesn't deserve the right to be treated like something with emotions, I'd happily eradicat the entire fing species with whatever would assure they all die if I could, humans are the cause of ALL the worlds problems and as a result I very strongly dislike all humans, if I had to choose between saving the human race from a disease that would kill every last one of them or returning the world to the natural state it was in before humans destroyed everything in the name of progress, I would choose returning the world to natures hands
And I've had to see many many therapist to try and change that view but it doesn't work and i still end up regarding humans as vermin incarnate

[Mr Mystery]

Eating's pretty damn basic but should we outlaw restaurants and jail chefs? And you can get pretty intellectual about sex if you want to. And being interested in sex doesn't make you uninterested in science or other pursuits.

Yep. Like most people, I'm quite a fan of a 'bit of the other'. But that doesn't mean it's my sole endeavour in life. Indeed, I'm very happy to go without for months, sometimes years at a time because it's just not that high a priority (I've even been known to turn down offers!) Main reason for that is I value quality over quantity. I need to at least find my partner attractive to start getting to nekkid o'clock, and as with most of my endeavours, I like to make sure I'm devoted to the task at hand. That's just me though - I'm quite weird in my own very personal and peculiar way!

Yes, some people do take it all too far, letting it define them. But how is that different to someone obsessed with exercise, or someone who seemingly won't stop eating, or someone hooked on spending money? They're all things your average human being does to some extent or other which become problematic when it becomes a person's sole life focus. Excessive exercise knackers your body. Excessive eating can kill. Not living within your means is only going to end one way.

[Psychosplodge]

Also a lot of primates like to fling their **** at each other and eat bugs but I'll be passing on that one thanks.

I thought that was the internet?

[Mr Mystery]

i thought that was dakkadakka?

ftfy

[Psychosplodge]

lols
that's on the internet...

[Mr Mystery]

lols
that's on the internet...

Actually, it's so toxic an evironment it was banished to it's own, inexplicably easily accessible, internet.

[CoffeeGrunt]

So ignoring the commenter saying we should kill off the race, because that's a lucid and level-headed response that can only contribute to this thread...

*Ahem.*

Is it really racial, this situation with Beyonce? I mean, twerking is now hardly a solely "black" thing, it's spread to a lot of the culture via Miley Cyrus and other artists. It's probably been appropriated by other races as much as black people now, so it's kinda like someone saying that a person calling Blues bad music is racist because decades back it was a black-dominated genre of music.

The issue's probably more pertinent to the age-old dichotomy of feminism is about women being able to be freely sexual, but they're not allowed to be freely sexual because it's what the 'patriarchy' wants.

[Gotthammer]

it's kinda like someone saying that a person calling Blues bad music is racist because decades back it was a black-dominated genre of music.

Remember that when blues first started spreading into white youth culture it was derided as "jungle music" which is a racially charged term if ever I've heard one. Also that before it was rhythm and blues it was literally called "race music", so it wasn't just black dominated - it was black people music. Same for twerking - until recently it was a dance for black women.

And twerking has been around for 20 years and even when white artists use it (Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, Lily Allen) feature black backup dancers - Allen even sings “I don’t need to shake my *ss for you because I have a brain" while a black girl dances behind her. It's still very heavily racially coded, so when that is the sole reason for saying someone who is very vocal and public about being a feminist isn't one, it's pretty suspect.

[Arkhan Land]

gotta add in there Katy Red told me that straights stole twerking form sissy bounce. and I trust her.

[YorkNecromancer]

[url]http://jezebel.com/woman-in-viral-catcalling-video-gets-rape-threats-1652179594/all[/url]

look if you haven't guessed by now I hate the entirety of the human species and it's supposed civilisation, all humans have ever done to me 90% of the time is single me out as some kind of freak who doesn't deserve the right to be treated like something with emotions, I'd happily eradicat the entire fing species with whatever would assure they all die if I could, humans are the cause of ALL the worlds problems and as a result I very strongly dislike all humans, if I had to choose between saving the human race from a disease that would kill every last one of them or returning the world to the natural state it was in before humans destroyed everything in the name of progress, I would choose returning the world to natures hands
And I've had to see many many therapist to try and change that view but it doesn't work and i still end up regarding humans as vermin incarnate

Nature's hands?! Lions and tigers and bears and necrotising fasciitis? Nature is the purest form of horror and destruction there is; I've never understood the attitude that says she's somehow 'balanced'. Anyone who's done the slightest work on ecology or ecosystems knows there's no such thing as a natural balance; just endless, endless violence, dominance and horror to nature. Where do you think human cruelty comes from? We're at the top of the food chain because our intellect makes us really, really good at violence... Good enough that we can move past it.

So I think this statement is kind of flawed. It's an unfortunate viewpoint overall. Are you sure you're not falling victim to cognitive bias? You've said before that you like to be logical, but I don't think that's possible if you've already decided humans are evil. If you formulate your viewpoint prior to data gathering, you begin to twist facts to support your supposition, and thus you find you're always right. You want to prove humans are awful? You've picked the easiest thing in the world to do, because there's always more a**holes. Doesn't mean you're right; only half-right.

I suggest you're simply not hanging out with the right ones. Case in point: I was bullied by everyone at school, up to, and including by the teachers, who joined in the name calling. So yeah, when I left school, I was full of more hate than you might readily imagine. But then I left and actually started meeting people and making real friends. I decided that anyone who was unpleasant? I'd never speak to them again, or see them if I could avoid it. Funnily enough, I may not have many of them, but those friendships I do have are incredibly strong.

You sound like you actively hunt out reasons to hate people. I get that. I do the same. I just look for the good as well. See, when I decided to become a teacher, mostly to make sure no-one went through what I did, I was forced to do something very strange. Almost unnatural.

The thing is, if you want to be a good teacher, you have to adopt a 3:1 ratio of good comments to negative ones if you want to pass your training. So, instead of pointing out people's flaws, the course forced me into pointing out what they were doing right. After a lifetime of hate, a lifetime of cynicism and seeing only the bad things, it felt utterly unnatural. Like I was lying to them. Except I wasn't. I made a point of only ever praising people if they had done something right, or well.

And it turns out, if you force yourself to look for the positive, there's a lot of it there. Almost everyone has something good about them. But here's the thing: you have to actively force yourself, because your perceptions? They are flawed, like everyone's. You've looked outside and seen a lot of blackbirds, so now you're telling everyone 'all the birds are black.' If I respond 'yeah, but what about those white ones?' does that mean you're still right, or just not counting them because you haven't been looking closely enough? Because I'll tell you now, I know a lot of good people, and one or two truly great ones. People who would die to help their friends. Kind people who would give you the shirt from their back. If you haven't met any yet, that says something about the circles you move in, not the world. If someone like me can find acceptance, anyone can.

Now, you might think I'm being naive about evil people. Oh no. I still have a lot of hate in me. I've wanted people dead. And I'm not saying that hyperbolically; there are people I have genuinely thought about killing, because the cost to society of their continued existence is simply too high. But I've moved past that, because you know what? It's an immature attitude to want to destroy what we hate. An adult works to make the world better: to change the things they hate, to educate the fool, to mitigate the harm of the monster.

The world sucks? Of course it does. We live in a world where men throw acid into the faces of women who reject them. People are mean? Of course they are… but why does that mean you get to sink to their level? Why return their hate with hate? That just makes the world a fouler place. You want the world to be better? MAKE IT BETTER. Lead by example. Join a support group. Volunteer. Make meaningful friends. And always remember that the internet is mostly poison for your soul. Soak yourself in hate and you won't be full of sparkles and light.

Things don't get better over time by themselves. You have to make them. Counselling doesn't work for you? Maybe you need a new therapist. Maybe you're just not ready for it yet. Maybe you need more life experience. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

The bottom line seems to be that you're very unhappy. If you want that to change, you need to take positive steps in your own life that will take you well out of your comfort zone. You may well be very, very scared. Life may well get worse before it gets better. But no happiness is unearned. Nothing good comes from staying in an unhappy situation. My depression didn't cure itself. I had to work to claw that s*** off me, and even now, it still threatens to come back each and every day. I didn't overcome my OCD by giving into it. Sometimes I'm still wracked with terror that because I've listened to the wrong song, something awful will happen. Our conditions only define us if we let them. Other people's ignorance only defines us if we let it.

So I guess what I'm saying is stay angry if you want to stay angry. You want to find the world is a bad place, you'll never be wrong. You want a better world? Only you can help you.