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  1. #11


    The Battle Of Waterdoom.
    An Oldhammer (Warhammer 1st Edition) Battle Report.
    All 3 parts are up on my blog. So read the full story there!

    Taken from:

    Since this blog's fluff is surely a blight on Tolkien purist's radars, and probably Warhammer purists as well, I will now offend another type of purist. Perhaps, the most rarefied purist of them all - the Napoleonic wargamer, or as I call it... Nappy gaming! (Yuck even I hate the term, but I am embracing it with all my newfound shockjock wargaming blog vitriol.)

    I wanted to do this parody of the Battle of Waterloo a month ago for the bicentennial anniversary, but the progress of this blog's fluff and the status of painted figures were not at a sufficient level to do so. But here it is at last! As fashionably late as Marshal Grouchy to the sound of the guns. Im guessing this is going to be a pic heavy affair, so I will chop it into parts. No new painted figures, this is purely a fluff/AAR post (after action report). I will be using Warhammer 1st Edition, so this is a proper Oldhammer battle!

    When last we left you, Gimli and company had decided to put off the search for Balin (they found a map to his location though). Scouts were reporting that orcs were massing for an attack against the fledgling Eastgate colony, Gimli gave orders for an immediate return to help in its defense.

    But they were ambushed in tight tunnels and caverns by Dragons of various colors spitting fire and acid and lightning. Also, black hooded Drow were hampering their advance. Little did the dwarves know that they were being corralled towards a large cavernous expanse known as Waterdoom. It was roughly square in its shape with a chamber hewn from the living rock on one end and a rise of rock on the other. (the cave of Caerbannog, wherein, carved in mystic runes, upon the very living rock, the last words of Olfin Bedwere of Rheged ... ) In the center was a mossy vegetation and a small marshy pit. This was ground of the Dark Elf general's choosing... a plan long thought out. Plans within plans. (I will not fear, fear is the mind killer!)

    So Victory Points, or VP is the object of this battle. If at any point, Dwarves control 3 VPs they win a sudden death victory! The game ends when this happens or if the Dwarves are all defeated. Sound easy? Not so fast! Orcs will arrive on the Eastern edge at the start of Turn 6 on a d6 roll of 5+. If they dont arrive then, roll at the start of each turn. 4+ on Turn 7, 3+ on Turn 8, 2+ on Turn 9, automatic arrival on Turn 10.

    Also, the Dwarves setup first without knowing where or how many enemies they will be facing! Ooo, scary... deploy smartly, lil stunties!

    PS. House rule: No Hatred rules for my Dwarves. I want control over them, no mindless moving towards enemy.

    PS ps. Remember, this isnt just a battle report, the outcome will affect the whole fluff of the blog! Actually that isnt saying much, since Im making up all this stuff on the spot. I take pics and hope my brain will weave it all into a somewhat cohesive storyline. And now, there sure are alot of characters and storylines going on... I hope I can keep all of it straight. Im optimistic but no promises of consistency! (Oh God, how is evil Balin going to fit into this whole mess? Or that darned new Lizard king fella?) But at any rate, if the Dwarves win this battle, they make it back to Easthold long before it is sieged, which in game terms, means they help the entrenchment level of the fortress; more food stores, ammunition, higher defenses of the walls and gates, and also better scout information on the enemy advance. However, if they lose, Gimli and company are cutoff from Easthold and must decide on going west, upwards towards Mazarbul and the higher levels, or downwards to the more difficult levels where even more enemies live. Or perhaps that secret map that Pickles found in the last battle?

    View from the Western edge of the table. Nearest to the edge we see the Chamber of Hougoumont.

    Pickles: It sure looks like Balins Tomb!

    Hodor: But its not.

    Pickles: How many chambers are there in Moria that have a tomb smack dab in its center and a blue light glowing down on it? What are the odds?

    Hodor: Just go with the bit, dude!

    And the view from the Eastern edge of the table. Closest to us is the rise of rock known as Papelotte.

    Pickles: I think thats the hill where Prince Uther and Helfast defended the Beer Cart from the Beholder! But that cant be! That hill is outside Moria miles away from here! There's some inconsistencies in this fluff I object to!

    Hodor: You know what, you got something there. Sometimes I think we are all just pawns in some big cosmic game.

    And here is the central "valley" of Waterdoom Cavern. With the mossy vegetation known as La Haye Sainte. and slightly north east of it is the Sandpit, errr I mean the Swamp Pit. And to the north of both is the northern exit of the Cavern.

    Pickles: You know La Haye Sainte means Holy Hedge? Or maybe even Holy Wood... its Hollywood, man! In the future, thats where the humans make movies about us! They think we arent real, Hodor! But they are the ones that dont even exist yet!

    Hodor: Dude, my mind is blown...

    (Disembodied voice of Jesse Ventura): Miiiinnnnd Controooolll. HAARP, chemtrails, its all a conspiracy little Dwarf people!

    Victory Point 1 is next to the well in the Chamber of Hougoumont.

    VP 2 is in Holywood, err La Haye Sainte.

    VP 3 is the north exit tunnel out of Waterdoom

    VP 4 is in the Swamp Pit

    And VP 5 is on top of Papelotte "hill"

    4 Hours earlier...

    Lord Commander Alric: We still dont have enough forces to crush these Dwarves. We underestimated their stubbornness. We are not powerful enough to stand against Gimli and his Dwarf Lords.

    Alyssa: But our dark elf soldiers... They are the salt of the Blackroot Vale!

    Lord Commander Alric: Scum! Nothing but beggars and scoundrels. Mushroom Ale is the limit of their patriotism.

    Alyssa: Yet you expect them to die for you?

    Lord Commander Alric: mm hmm

    (enter Orc Ambassador Muffling)

    Alyssa: That Orc will spoil the dancing!

    Lord Commander Alric: Muffling! Where is General Gragg and his army?

    Orc Ambassador Muffling: Gimli beat us at the Chamber of Mazarbul but he did not send any force to pursue us.

    Lord Commander Alric: If General Gragg will fight the Dwarves, I promise to hold them here in Waterdoom. Tell him, I know Drow and Orcs have never been the best of friends, but together we can rid Moria of the Dwarven menace!

    Orc Ambassador Muffling: On that promise, General Gragg would barbeque his favorite squig!

    Lord Commander Alric: I need you to tell Gragg, to march to us here in Waterdoom and outflank the Dwarves!

    View of the Dwarven left flank. Commanders Hodor, Pickles, and Grombrindal face the Chamber of Hougoumont.

  2. #12


    Hodor leads a chant to boost the morale of his mercenaries.

    Silver, Gold, Mithril... Trinkets! Loot! Loot! Loot!

    Pickles has been given a field promotion and now commands a small tunnel fighting outfit.

    Grombrindal, the White Dwarf stands ready to battle!

    Porkins: I hope no Dragons show up this time!

    Grombrindal: Be a good fellow and settle down Mr Porkins... you will upset the lads.

    The Dwarven main force in the center. Gimli and his advisors decide the main strategy is to break and control the center. There are 3 VPs there, enough to win the game. The side VPs are just a distraction. (Hmm, the Dwarves line of thought seems oddly similar to a certain French fella's strategy as well. Come to think of it, Mr Bonaparte might have been a stuntie due to his smallish stature)

    Dwarven high command: Nindalf the wizard, Gimli, and Baron Hawk.

    Here are Nindalf's spells and info:

    Constitution is generated thus: 2d4 x mastery level +4

    Nindalf is a Level 2 wizard and ends up rolling a measly 4 on 2d4 (I dont think I ever rolled d4s in a miniature wargame before!) So his constitution is 12. Which means in the whole battle he can cast 12 points worth of spells. Each spell has energy cost, which is basically constitution cost.

    Here are his randomly generated spells:

    Level 1 Spells

    - Cure Light Injury: 3 energy, cures 1 wound

    - Far Sight: extends line of sight, pretty much useless in this game

    - Fireball: 2 energy per fireball, can cast 2 per turn, 24" range str 2

    - Bless: 4 energy, lasts d4+1 turns, gives target an additional 3+ save

    Level 2 Spells

    - Smash Door: useless here

    - Turn to Frog: Sounds great! Then you realize it only targets the caster. Hmm... for escaping?

    - Mystic Mist: 4 energy, 12 diameter cloud blocks line of sight, but also forces anyone in it to randomly move only 1" in their move phase. This could be very useful!

    King Gorrin and his Dwarf Lords are THE Old Guard!

    Ive made each one of them a minor hero!

    Gloin and his veterans.

    Grumpy: Harrumph...

    The main unit of the Reaper Clan stands ready!

    On the Dwarven right, facing Papelotte.

    Captain Drogo, Baron Hawk's second in command, leads another unit of the Reaper Clan

  3. #13


    Finally, we have Wallace and his Irregulars. They are a motley assembly of miners, scouts and ne'er do wells.

    Hamish: There's somebody coming.

    Campbell: MacGregors from the next clan.

    MacGregor: We heard about what was happenin' and don't want you "Amadans" thinkin' you can have your fun without us.

    Wallace: Go home. Some of us are in this; can't help that, now. But you can help yourselves. Go home.

    MacGregor: We'll have no homes left when the Orcs come through and burn us out. And they will!

    [Wallace motions for the MacGregors to join them]

    Hodor marches into the room! Dwarves in oldhammer move a measly 3 and a half inches.

    I must remember the Turn sequence, which is:

    1 Movement

    2 Shooting

    3 Combat

    4 Second Movement - as long as you didnt Combat, also no closer than 4" of enemy

    5 Magic

    6 Routing

    So there is no running. You can charge in the first move phase though, but not the second. Also, countercharges are available, which helps in the "To Hit" chart as a modifier.

    Pickles is going to back up Hodor.

    Grombrindal and Gimli decide to act as reserves and hold their ground. When the Dark Elf positions are revealed they can then decide where best to lend a hand.

    The center moves forwards with Gloin, Baron Hawk, and Captain Drogo. Nindalf thinks about casting a Bless spell, but decides to wait, afterall energy points are so precious. So precioussssss....

    And finally, Wallace decides its probably best to go right up that hill instead of to the left and around. Lucky for him, his troops are excellent at climbing the "high" ground. Get it? Coz they are "high"landers? Ba dum psh..... (Crickets)

    Next post: The Battle Begins!

    Parts 2 & 3 are available exclusively on my blog, so go there to see the rest of the battle!

    For part 2 go to

    For part 3 go to

  4. #14


    Dungeon Chef: Quest For Meat, An Oldhammer AAR
    Warhammer 1st Edition Battle Report

    Taken from:

    Units of Orcs and rumors of the Undead approach! Princes Ulther and Helfast are ordered to harass and delay the enemy. King Kazador is fortifying the defenses of the fortress outpost known as Easthold. Even the civilians are doing their part to help the war effort. Twelve Dwarves are tasked with gathering food supplies for the upcoming siege of Easthold. This is their story...

    Hello, dear readers to yet another 3-part Battle report! Im still using Warhammer 1st Edition for this. This time its a bit smaller in scope, and gives us the perfect scenario to help introduce some secondary characters in Easthold. Im using a card deck to determine this scenario's enemy appearances - they will arrive randomly after turn 4, in groups of 4, 5, 6, 7, or 8. A Dwarven reinforcement card is also in the deck. On top of that, six tokens are placed on the board for the Objective locations. These tokens are numbered and represent a dungeon denizen that the Dwarves are hunting for food supplies. Each of these have their own stats and abilities, but also have their own temperament rating. Some are aggressive and charge the Dwarves, some are indifferent and remain stationary, and others will bolt and run from the hunters. The tokens are revealed by rolling a die when a Dwarf is within range of it. Some dwarves have modifiers that help them when rolling on their temperament monster rating check. Once a monster has lost all its wounds, it is considered to be "Bonked" - a good thumping to its noggin will tame the beast and it will move at the speed of any Dwarf that leads it. Each monster has a dungeon meat rating, which are worth victory points.

    Victory table is:

    Dwarf Major victory - Bring back 7 or 8 points worth of dungeon meat and have no Dwarven losses.

    Dwarf Minor victory - Bring back 5 or more points worth of dungeon meat and have no more than 3 Dwarven casualties.

    Draw - Above conditions not met.

    Enemy victory - Dwarves have 5 or more casualties

    These victory conditions will affect the Siege of Easthold scenario.

    And now we bring you to the action....

    From left to right: Mochi the Dwarf Ninja, Ratcatcher, Chumley, and Dudley the woodcutter

    "Be vewwey vewwy quiet, Im hunting wabbit!"

    Mochi, being a ninja sneaks forward towards the first counter! Chumley in his armor makes a racket and decides to hang back while the more stealthy Dwarves move into position ahead.

    Getting closer, the stunties should be able to identify the target any second!

    Penny, a female Dwarf from the Reaper Clan also comes forward, using her crossbow to cover Mochi and Ratcatcher.

    Penny: (whispers) What is it, Mochi?

    Mochi: OMG! Its... its...

    I turn over the counter and its revealed to be monster meat number 2... Myconid. Myconids are a race of sentient fungoids. Some of them can release dangerous spores when attacked. Luckily, this is a "garden variety" Myconid. It is worth 1 Dungeon meat.

    Its indifferent to the Dwarves and just stands there stupidly.

    Mochi: Cowabunga!

    Ratcatcher: (slaps forehead)

    Penny: Cut him some slack. Yeah, maybe he isnt teenage or a mutant, but he is a ninja.

    Mochi jump kicks the creature, excited to add mushroom cuisine to the larders of Easthold!

    Ratcatcher has his hands full, holding back his frisky rodent companion.

    And the Dwarves have their first success, as the Myconid is quickly Bonked into submission.

    Bertha, the cook wrangles it and has it follow her to the main tunnel entrance.

    Sleepy Dwarf is elected to watch over the captured creatures.

    Bertha: Dont let them get away, Sleepy! Or else!

    Overview of the game board. The southern tunnel at the bottom is where Sleepy is.

    The center bridge is where the first token was revealed.

    There are five more: southwest, northwest, north, northeast, and south east.

    The corners are where possible advancing enemies may appear.

    All captured creatures and Dwarves must exit from the southern tunnel only.

    A Dwarf that stands sentry at the corners provide a modifier when enemies appear there. This represents the early warning a sentry provides. A drunk dwarf will only provide a +1, but a more vigilant Dwarf provides a +2

    The Dwarves know that enemies are approaching quickly and must decide to spread their forces thin and explore as many locations as possible or play safe and move slowly and surely. They decide to risk it and spread out! Good luck little stunties!

    To see what happens next visit my blog for posts 2 and 3 of this battle report.


  5. #15


    I know its a shameless plug, but please help support the Moria Reclamation Project.

    Dwarves need your help to retake their homeland.
    Remember a happy Dwarf is a well provisioned Dwarf!
    If you need miniatures painted, look no further...

    Cheap, but good painting service from yours truly here in the USA.
    $2 per rank and file, $6 per character
    Fantasy, Sci-Fi, even Historicals! I can paint them. Read more below...

    Full story here:


    Now for some pics of fantasy, sci-fi, and historical minis that Ive painted recently and from long ago...

    Recently painted fantasy mini.
    Oh and look at that barbarian…
    why is he skulking around Moria?
    Those dirty pesky humans are making a move into the neighborhood!

    Some custom Rogue Trader conversions I made. These are part of 10 space explorers that are going up on eBay soon.

    Some Nappy cavalry, photo taken back before I had a good camera. But Ive painted French nappies, Austrians, Prussians, Russians. For colonials, I painted Zulus, Sudanese and Brits. Ive painted Vietnam for moderns as well. I have a full Osprey library, so I can do any period really.
    Last edited by mars-minis; 07-24-2015 at 03:42 AM.

  6. #16


    Oldhammer Slann, Chaos Dwarves, and Metal Magic Orcs Too!
    Pre-Game interviews:
    You got Bullywugs in my Ziggurat!
    or Guard my sacred spawning pool!

    From full post:

    Im going to have a Warhammer 1st edition battle tomorrow based on the "Ziggurat of Doom" scenario.
    Thought I would show off the figures today and introduce the forces that will be involved in the upcoming conflict.

    Here are some Slann guarding one of their sacred spawning pools.
    Slann come in many colors, I chose to stick with the Kremlo lore, and paint them as the "BlueSpine" tribe.
    Left to Right: Musician, Slavemaster, Kremlo, Warrior, Herald, Palace Guard Officer.
    These are C-32 Slann from 1987.
    Kremlo actually has a scenario in Citadel Compendium #1 "The Legend of Kremlo the Slann".
    I think this might be the only scenario written for 1st edition, outside of the White Box and Forces of Fantasy.
    Apparently, he was raised by humans and took up arms against his own species. Here in Moria, he has been forgiven of his past misdeeds and cant wait to show his loyalty to the Slann cause.

    As an aside… Here's a look at it. The scenario itself isnt anything great, fluffwise or mechanically as a game. But it does have great artwork! Look at that old school charm!
    Than again, the "Ziggurat of Doom" scenario isnt that great either. But I will spruce it up, with more victory conditions, more forces, more objectives and random event cards.

    For full story:

  7. #17


    A Warhammer 1st Edition Battle Report.
    Lots of Dwarven bravery in the face of impending doom!
    Plus Slann-nation... who doesnt love Kermit the Frog's people?

    From full post here:

    Balin, son of Fundin, Lord of Moria was surrounded by a flash of magical light. When his eyes adjusted, he found himself and his companions transported to a ziggurat in a humid jungle that could only be The Temple of Chicken-Itza in the Savage Lands, far below Moria. His 2nd in Command, Mad Furrikson gave a low growl, how he hated magic, that mad one.

    To read what happens next:

    All 3 parts of the battle report are up, now!

  8. #18


    Tyrion Lannister has been transported out of Westeros by some unknown power. He has been teleported not just through time and space, but also out of dimension, out of fictional canon... into the Moria Reclamation Project! He doesnt come alone, he has companions from other surprising and unlikely places. What fantastic adventures are bound to happen with the coming of these latest arrivals.

    Narrator: You're traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. That's the signpost up ahead - your next stop, the Twilight Zone!

    Onwards to pics, fluff, and a skirmish! I wont be using Warhammer 1st edition here. Will you be able to guess which rules Im using, just from the descriptions?

    Tyrion and Podrick

    Tyrion - Lived in some squabbly gossipy land far to the west. In this land, he was pretty much the only Dwarf around. He is also called the Imp, Halfman, and his favorite - the Demon Monkey. For reasons unknown, he has been magically teleported to Moria. He has also acquired the services of some really savage looking barbarians. He once told someone that a mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone. You know nothing, Jon Snow!

    Podrick - A simple and loyal boy who squires for Tyrion. Apparently, he is a big hit with the ladies.

    See the full post here:

  9. #19
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Isle of Man


    some very cool stuff you have there, great job
    Twelve monkeys, eleven hats. One monkey is sad.

  10. #20



    Thanks very much for reading!



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